Saturday, October 3, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
whatever
a) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVHt1naafJg
b) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp9a4syLwaw
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rogop4J9KhU
b) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp9a4syLwaw
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rogop4J9KhU
I read this today:
Miriam was staring me all night long.
She so digs me.
Or I had mustard on my shirt.
Sometimes I feel like that.
She so digs me.
Or I had mustard on my shirt.
Sometimes I feel like that.
Monday, June 8, 2009
rock and roll, days are passing fast and the shooting is coming closer. the people are great and the only weak member is me, myself, but I do have strong boner... I like what I do even if lacking a lot of knowledge, the people around me - none better to learn from, dont know who to thank for that. too much to think about to overload myself with smnelses issues, hurts or not, I really dont have time for it. its about work and last two exams and a portfolio to put together and to move out and then move in, work calls after that, bills to pay, independency to run. if you want to spend good time with me, then dont fucking be scared of it.
Saturday, June 6, 2009
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
bugaaaak!
what a weekend! thursday after the supertough french test, got home cleaned the apartment in 2 hours, nervous because of the crazy landlord, things got settled, hitchhiked to tallinn, but got to kose, marsa to the city, packing things, getting on the van with friends to hit towards haapsalu. 3 days of shooting, lots of sun, lots of emotions and and many new ideas, some disappoitment, some fun, some real respect to dear friends. for example i found out i am not able to act but then again i realised that if anything in my life i really like, its the adrenaline of this kind of things.
philosphy exame trough, academical princeps to go and then its all about drama and mama.
philosphy exame trough, academical princeps to go and then its all about drama and mama.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
the library of the university during the exame session is open until midnight and they serve some tea, coffee and cookies for the late night ones still studying. I didnt know this and I was pleased to find this out and it made me happy .) moving out of our appartment in Tartu is coming closer, so much to do and I am sick, but Tartu is beautiful, full of lilacs blossoming and green all over and it kind of makes me sad to go away, well - summer is almost here.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
long weekend, weird weekend, good weekend, neverending weekend, getting sick weekend, getting worried weekend, happy weekend, lots of thoughts weekend, non eating weekend, dont give a damn weekend, sittinglaying on the grass weekend, working weekend, non drinking weekend, autostopping weekend, brainstorming weekend, cantwaittoseemyphotos weekend, organising weekend, thinking weekend, summerwaiting weekend, allgood weekend,
tiredashell weekend, missingfriends weekend, meetingsome weekend, sessionstarts weekend.
tiredashell weekend, missingfriends weekend, meetingsome weekend, sessionstarts weekend.
zuccini filled with parmesan and a hint of tyhme. creamy pasta with cashew nuts and sweet pear sauce. crazy salad with yellow plums, cherry tomatoes, balsamico dressing and some goat cheese. coffee. cheesecake with berrysauce and some ice-cream. martini bianco. or even if not these, then a simple cheeseomlet would do! gosh, this fasting. give a 100 % respect to O.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Monday, May 18, 2009
the weekend was great, spent few days in a spa discussing over stuff like what is European Union and whatfor and met some new cool people too, lost my Cervantes on the way in the bus, which i really feel sorry for... but then again the sauna on the 9th floor with a cold jacuzzi was worth it, or was it? eheh... back in tartu, i took my zent-e to the camera shop and developped the film, results will be hanged up in a week, i am also exited to see the photos as these will be freaky experimental ones as i took half of the photos with red and green colored lens-covers. well, cant wait. and i saw randomly, a cool movie what is called "ON THE EDGE" by John Carney. It is a beautiful and sad, funny movie where the main character wants to kill himself and drives over a cliff but does not die and ends up in a small suicide rehab, what happens next is yours to find out as i really liked the movie and suggest this one to watch. Not to mention the gorgeous Cillian Murphy in the main role playing Jonathan.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
takashi miike
Miike was born in Yao, Osaka, Japan. Although he claimed to have attended classes only rarely, he graduated from Yokohama Vocational School of Broadcast and Film (Yokohama Hoso Eiga Senmon Gakko) under the guidance of renowned filmmaker Shohei Imamura. Miike has garnered international notoriety for depicting shocking scenes of extreme violence and bizarre sexual perversions. Many of his films contain graphic and lurid bloodshed, often portrayed in an over-the-top, cartoonish manner. Much of his work depicts the activities of criminals (especially yakuza) or concern themselves with non-Japanese living in Japan. He is known for his black sense of humor and for pushing the boundaries of censorship as far as they will go. It should be noted that, despite his somewhat notorious reputation, Miike has also proven himself to be capable of directing lighthearted children's films (Zebraman, The Great Yokai War), touching period pieces (Sabu), and subdued, moving pictures such as the road movie The Bird People in China.
I watched this movie without any expectations as I had not seen anything else from his works altough knowing some names and loving Asian cinema. From reading what Ive read so far about his work, this is definately one of the "other type of movies". He is an extraordinary filmmaker and such are his works. The Bird People in China reflects magical realism pulling a very fair line between illusion and the truth. The whole movie is a journey of two Japanese guys: a "salary-man" and a Yakuza debt-collector who are looking for a jade mine in China, the search leads them to a small village in the middle of nowhere, with beautiful scenery and fading traditions of the bird people. At one point of the story the two men have to choose whether they want to stay or go and what will it bring to the village if the world will find this last jewel, that brings many desagreements and the story ultimately becomes a voyage of ideological discovery of modern man. Last but not least Miike has made this into a scenically stunning movie, where his comic vision towards to the only true adventure is the hunt for meaning.
A fairytale-like movie, where for my surprise, the best shot was about killing, which can also try to caracterize a little his work. And just because I like these kind of facts: Miike is almost never publicly seen without wearing sunglasses.
I watched this movie without any expectations as I had not seen anything else from his works altough knowing some names and loving Asian cinema. From reading what Ive read so far about his work, this is definately one of the "other type of movies". He is an extraordinary filmmaker and such are his works. The Bird People in China reflects magical realism pulling a very fair line between illusion and the truth. The whole movie is a journey of two Japanese guys: a "salary-man" and a Yakuza debt-collector who are looking for a jade mine in China, the search leads them to a small village in the middle of nowhere, with beautiful scenery and fading traditions of the bird people. At one point of the story the two men have to choose whether they want to stay or go and what will it bring to the village if the world will find this last jewel, that brings many desagreements and the story ultimately becomes a voyage of ideological discovery of modern man. Last but not least Miike has made this into a scenically stunning movie, where his comic vision towards to the only true adventure is the hunt for meaning.
A fairytale-like movie, where for my surprise, the best shot was about killing, which can also try to caracterize a little his work. And just because I like these kind of facts: Miike is almost never publicly seen without wearing sunglasses.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
can anyone tell me some answers that I never will be able to answer? sometimes I wish there could be this one thing, maybe a black monolith, or a person, maybe a longwhitebearded man, whatever, that would say: yes, I know and I want to share my wisdom with you, although you need to walk your own way, which I cannot do for you, I can show the right direction towards to go. I cant live my life thinking only on today and at the same time trying to fix things for the future makes the present turn into a mess. its like all the deeds we do are dots in the sky and all of them are connected with different kind of relationships. human relationships are the most interesting of them all and I soppose one of he hardest things to understand. I started to search for some explinations and I found this:
The relationships we have with other people are projections of the relationships we have within ourselves. Our external relationships and our internal relationships are in fact the same relationships. They only seem different because we look at them through different lenses.
Let’s consider why this is true. Where do all your relationships exist? They exist in your thoughts. Your relationship with another person is whatever you imagine it to be. Whether you love someone or hate someone, you’re right. Now the other person may have a completely different relationship to you, but understand that your representation of what someone else thinks of you is also part of your thoughts. So your relationship with someone includes what you think of that person and what you believe s/he thinks of you. You can complicate it further by imagining what the other person thinks you think of him/her, but ultimately those internal representations are all you have.
Even if your relationships exist in some objective reality independent of your thoughts, you never have access to the objective viewpoint. You’re always viewing your relationships through the lens of your own consciousness. The closest you can get to being objective is to imagine being objective, but that is in no way the same thing as true objectivity. That’s because the act of observation requires a conscious observer, which is subjective by its very nature.
At first it might seem troublesome that you can never hope to gain a truly accurate, 100% objective understanding of your relationships. You can never escape the subjective lens of your own consciousness. That would be like trying to find the color blue with a red lens permanently taped over your eyes. That doesn’t stop people from trying, but such attempts are in vain. If you fall into the trap of trying to think of your relationships as objective entities that are external to you, you’ll be using an inescapably inaccurate model of reality. Consequently, the likely outcome is that you’ll frustrate yourself to no end when it comes to human relationships. You’ll make relating to other people a lot harder than it needs to be. Intuitively you may know something is off in your approach to relationships, but you’ll remain stuck until you realize that every relationship you have with another person is really a relationship that exists entirely within yourself.
Fortunately, once you embrace the subjective nature of relationships, you’ll have a much easier time relating to people. It’s easier to get where you want to go when you have an accurate map. The subjective view of relationships implies that you can change or improve your relationships with others by working on the internal relationships within yourself. Furthermore, you can improve your internal relationships, such as your self-esteem, by working on your relationships with others. Ultimately it’s all the same thing.
According to the subjective model, when you forgive, accept, and love all parts of yourself, you will forgive, accept, and love all other human beings as they are. The more you improve your internal relationships between your thoughts, beliefs, and intentions, the more loving and harmonious your human relationships will become. Hold unconditional love in your consciousness, and you’ll see it reflected in your reality.
By Steve Pavlina
The relationships we have with other people are projections of the relationships we have within ourselves. Our external relationships and our internal relationships are in fact the same relationships. They only seem different because we look at them through different lenses.
Let’s consider why this is true. Where do all your relationships exist? They exist in your thoughts. Your relationship with another person is whatever you imagine it to be. Whether you love someone or hate someone, you’re right. Now the other person may have a completely different relationship to you, but understand that your representation of what someone else thinks of you is also part of your thoughts. So your relationship with someone includes what you think of that person and what you believe s/he thinks of you. You can complicate it further by imagining what the other person thinks you think of him/her, but ultimately those internal representations are all you have.
Even if your relationships exist in some objective reality independent of your thoughts, you never have access to the objective viewpoint. You’re always viewing your relationships through the lens of your own consciousness. The closest you can get to being objective is to imagine being objective, but that is in no way the same thing as true objectivity. That’s because the act of observation requires a conscious observer, which is subjective by its very nature.
At first it might seem troublesome that you can never hope to gain a truly accurate, 100% objective understanding of your relationships. You can never escape the subjective lens of your own consciousness. That would be like trying to find the color blue with a red lens permanently taped over your eyes. That doesn’t stop people from trying, but such attempts are in vain. If you fall into the trap of trying to think of your relationships as objective entities that are external to you, you’ll be using an inescapably inaccurate model of reality. Consequently, the likely outcome is that you’ll frustrate yourself to no end when it comes to human relationships. You’ll make relating to other people a lot harder than it needs to be. Intuitively you may know something is off in your approach to relationships, but you’ll remain stuck until you realize that every relationship you have with another person is really a relationship that exists entirely within yourself.
Fortunately, once you embrace the subjective nature of relationships, you’ll have a much easier time relating to people. It’s easier to get where you want to go when you have an accurate map. The subjective view of relationships implies that you can change or improve your relationships with others by working on the internal relationships within yourself. Furthermore, you can improve your internal relationships, such as your self-esteem, by working on your relationships with others. Ultimately it’s all the same thing.
According to the subjective model, when you forgive, accept, and love all parts of yourself, you will forgive, accept, and love all other human beings as they are. The more you improve your internal relationships between your thoughts, beliefs, and intentions, the more loving and harmonious your human relationships will become. Hold unconditional love in your consciousness, and you’ll see it reflected in your reality.
By Steve Pavlina
Monday, May 11, 2009
Zhu Qizhan
I found this very cool site about this Chinese painter Zhu Quizhan who had an exhibition for the tenth anniversary of his death. Despite his quiet and kind manner, Zhu created a great revolution in modern Chinese painting. His fertile and ineffable imagination bridged East and West, past and present, and connoisseur and creator. Throughout his life, he stimulated interest in art among artists and encouraged continual challenge and development in the artistic tradition in order to ensure the continuing vitality of Chinese painting for the future.
You can read the article about his art and life and postlife and stuff from this link:
http://www.china2000fineart.com/onexhibit/22/onexhibit/text.html
Sunday, May 10, 2009
bwaaaaaah. emotions and no emotions. weekend over and another early wakening waiting. friday was cool and the party went well (regards to uve at this point!) time is fucking flying and i have been doing basically nothing which in one point makes me frustrated and in the other as knowing the cost which is worth it, i just pull myself together. today i passed my time in the city until late in the evening, went with r and r from Estonia to Juuksur where r spilled a cup of boiling tea on my leg so i had to jump around like a mad mia, touchè - but it damn hurts. but the company was great so the evening continued in the old town where we found heaps of food we ate and shared with eachother and also offered to the people who passed and who were nicely surprised and we all had a laugh in the middle of the Saiakang. later on r shared the sweet and salty buns to all the homeless people we met and by the time we got home we all felt good. i still do
Saturday, May 9, 2009
some political stuff in my kind of image
some more in this blog: http://xark.typepad.com/photos/xarkaganda/index.html
Friday, May 8, 2009
postcards from italy
The times we had
Oh, when the wind would blow with rain and snow
Were not all bad
We put our feet just where they had, had to go
Never to go
The shattered soul
Following close but nearly twice as slow
In my good times
There were always golden rocks to throw
at those who admit defeat too late
Those were our times, those were our times
And I will love to see that day
That day is mine
When she will marry me outside with the willow trees
And play the songs we made
They made me so
And I would love to see that day
Her day was mine
Oh, when the wind would blow with rain and snow
Were not all bad
We put our feet just where they had, had to go
Never to go
The shattered soul
Following close but nearly twice as slow
In my good times
There were always golden rocks to throw
at those who admit defeat too late
Those were our times, those were our times
And I will love to see that day
That day is mine
When she will marry me outside with the willow trees
And play the songs we made
They made me so
And I would love to see that day
Her day was mine
Thursday, May 7, 2009
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGquNrnTCWc&feature=related
hold your head up high
its much easier to smile
...
there is a song deep in your soul
that is going to get you on the right track
and help you reach your goal...
trouble times
...
you just hum this little song
and things wont go wrong....
uuh, doodle oh doo...
its much easier to smile
...
there is a song deep in your soul
that is going to get you on the right track
and help you reach your goal...
trouble times
...
you just hum this little song
and things wont go wrong....
uuh, doodle oh doo...
the blossoms here are coming out, its warm outside and i have a coffe overdose. jorma is coming over and we come together back to the city today, back to basics. im putting the playlist together for tomorrow as playing some music at one party and I`ll hang the playlist up soon to share too. went to listen umbero eco yesterday, was a great lecture. he has been selected as one of the most intelligent persons alive for a reason. and two days ago! iv made me so fucking happy just because he is like he is, an incredible person. got to let the good in people, if you yourself dont want to, it will not come. if you think it is hard to be happy, it is. you stop yourself from your own mind or heart. if you say to yourself i dont know how to love, i dont know what it feels like to be in love, you never will be, because you wont let yourself. if you say you are unhappy you will be. everything from the a to the end its in our heads.
Monday, May 4, 2009
to the girl i`m thinking about
hate love and lust
the words never written
the roads linger in dust
my heart under the iron sea
long live the shadows in meadows
its the morning coffee, late night tea
its a soul seeking another
lost emotions walking home
never had the chance, now lone
why it feels like swearing
when everything is allright
like goodness of it bearing
life is like a box of chocolate
you never know what you get
i lost you before we even really met
sleep tight love
forget the hate and live for lust
the words linger in dust
the words never written
the roads linger in dust
my heart under the iron sea
long live the shadows in meadows
its the morning coffee, late night tea
its a soul seeking another
lost emotions walking home
never had the chance, now lone
why it feels like swearing
when everything is allright
like goodness of it bearing
life is like a box of chocolate
you never know what you get
i lost you before we even really met
sleep tight love
forget the hate and live for lust
the words linger in dust
Sunday, May 3, 2009
the sweetest weekend where you feel like drowning in syrup but instead of trying to paddle and breathe you swallow with a smile and let yourself go. the summer is close.
thinking of helen, ironing alans shirts, listening the good mood music and just feelin great. and funny how sad at the same time, like life is. like the sound you hear, lingers in your ear, cant forget from sundown to the set, its everywhere, its going to grab a hold on you, california soul - the song of this summer.
so today these two!
totally this one:
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UW1QGrRmRQ4
and this for you, if you happen to read my blog for some reason:
d) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLI0w1nqGiQ&NR=1
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOBYp-BGWGg
thinking of helen, ironing alans shirts, listening the good mood music and just feelin great. and funny how sad at the same time, like life is. like the sound you hear, lingers in your ear, cant forget from sundown to the set, its everywhere, its going to grab a hold on you, california soul - the song of this summer.
so today these two!
totally this one:
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UW1QGrRmRQ4
and this for you, if you happen to read my blog for some reason:
d) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLI0w1nqGiQ&NR=1
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOBYp-BGWGg
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
days run like sand in a clock that never stops. sun is out and people too, beer and smiles and stupid songs. we had a four day commune life at ours, boys over from England means party and party only. by now I seriously hate club Illusion and alcohol has lost its fun. at Sunday the house was finally empty after millions of cleanings and people crashing in my bed at 5 am. I went for a run, listened some klassikaraadio, where for my suprise was an interview with Ave Alavainu and they playd some good Mozart.I ran in the sun and sat on the swings and fucking smiled out of blue, literally. At home, swetty and happy I took and bath and had a cold beer while being in the hot water. Went out to read some Cervantes, but fell asleep. One hour sleeping in the sun,outside equals with ten at bed,indoors. Felt like a baby and dremt of out trip to Hiiumaa and stopping in Haapsalu and swimming while screaming in the cold water and missed a little, but not so much, the people in Tallinn. but I have to say that Tartu in sun is much nicer, ehe .) Sunday night passed at friends who had her 22 bday, we ate heaps of cake and playd some piano. Tuesday came Mikk from the captal and we sat down with some beers to talk about the video, later had a dinner and playd some quitar. What wonderful days have passed - life, love, lust and walking bearfoot is a must. Music, bluesic, supersonic. and things just keep getting better, as my weekend starts today, gotta take a bus at noon. Tallinn, here I come!
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
w like wonderful
these are the original covers of the books which I discovered somehow while looking up stuff about "wonderful". thats what the day has been - wonderful. on the lower one you see Alice by the way .)
Monday, April 20, 2009
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76wsCjXg1DM
I am listening this and watching the video and the way her boobs move in a kinky and cute way.You know sometimes you think why the world turns and why you are and all this. And the more you think the more lost you get. We are in the end all dancing with ourselves, there is nothing to loose and nothign to prove. Sometimes I need a leading thought in my life, like a moto to follow which helps me to survive at some point of the need. For a very long time it was "memento et mori".And it still is. Remember that you are mortal. That we all die. The most human truth that makes us all even. And from there you start to think how we are all the same and so different what in turn makes us the same again. Who has the right to say how or who are you? Nobody - the only one who can judge you is tu, toi-meme. Never forget that and always remeber when judging somebody else. So lately I have been wondering in different trails of thoughts and for me there is no bigger truth out there than everything is just a question of the state-of-mind. If you say you cant, you cant.
"So lets sit and have another drink,
cause it will give me time to think
if I had the chance to ask the world to dance
I would be dancing with myself"
I am listening this and watching the video and the way her boobs move in a kinky and cute way.You know sometimes you think why the world turns and why you are and all this. And the more you think the more lost you get. We are in the end all dancing with ourselves, there is nothing to loose and nothign to prove. Sometimes I need a leading thought in my life, like a moto to follow which helps me to survive at some point of the need. For a very long time it was "memento et mori".And it still is. Remember that you are mortal. That we all die. The most human truth that makes us all even. And from there you start to think how we are all the same and so different what in turn makes us the same again. Who has the right to say how or who are you? Nobody - the only one who can judge you is tu, toi-meme. Never forget that and always remeber when judging somebody else. So lately I have been wondering in different trails of thoughts and for me there is no bigger truth out there than everything is just a question of the state-of-mind. If you say you cant, you cant.
"So lets sit and have another drink,
cause it will give me time to think
if I had the chance to ask the world to dance
I would be dancing with myself"
estonian is the most beautiful language
Keegi ei ütle mulle, kas ma olen rõõmus või mitte. Ära võta mult ära minu võimet hinnata ise millisel järjel minu elu on. Ma olen kuradi rõõmus ja ära küsi miks. Ma ei ole kindlasti nii nagu kõik ülejäänud, kui nad on rõõmsad ja kindlasti mitte kurb, nagu kõik ülejäänud on kurvad. Me paistame kaugelt ühtemoodi, ma tean.
Kui Sa jalutad metsas, siis on seal palju puid. Kui Sa kaugelt vaatad, siis on kõik need puud ühesugused. Aga kui Sa lähemalt vaatad, siis mõni on kuusk, mõni mänd, mõne puu lugu on aastakümneid pikk, mõnel vaid aastane jutuke. Kui sa vaatad tähti, siis kõik tähed on ühesugused. Nad kõik säravad seal mustal taustal. Vaid need, kes pingutavad näevad, et mõni on suurem kui teised, mõni virvendab ning mõni särab nii eredalt, et ei mõistagi kuidas Sa kohe ei saanud aru kui eriline see täht on. Kui Sa vaataksid sealt ülevalt tähtede seast alla, siis kõik puud oleksid väiksed, ühesugused täpid. Kui sa vaataksid mind, kes vaatab sind sealt alt, siis ka mina oleksin tähtsusetu täpp kõigi teiste väikeste täppide seas. Aga tule alla sealt ülevalt, astu ligi, küsi inimeselt kuidas tal läheb. Mida tema asjast arvab. Kes ta tegelikult on. Sa märkad... sa märkad et ta pole nagu kõik teised täpid.
"Ja nüüd tagasi välisuudiste juurde: teadlased ei ole ikka veel päris kindlad, miks elu on ilus."
Jimi Tenor
Kui Sa jalutad metsas, siis on seal palju puid. Kui Sa kaugelt vaatad, siis on kõik need puud ühesugused. Aga kui Sa lähemalt vaatad, siis mõni on kuusk, mõni mänd, mõne puu lugu on aastakümneid pikk, mõnel vaid aastane jutuke. Kui sa vaatad tähti, siis kõik tähed on ühesugused. Nad kõik säravad seal mustal taustal. Vaid need, kes pingutavad näevad, et mõni on suurem kui teised, mõni virvendab ning mõni särab nii eredalt, et ei mõistagi kuidas Sa kohe ei saanud aru kui eriline see täht on. Kui Sa vaataksid sealt ülevalt tähtede seast alla, siis kõik puud oleksid väiksed, ühesugused täpid. Kui sa vaataksid mind, kes vaatab sind sealt alt, siis ka mina oleksin tähtsusetu täpp kõigi teiste väikeste täppide seas. Aga tule alla sealt ülevalt, astu ligi, küsi inimeselt kuidas tal läheb. Mida tema asjast arvab. Kes ta tegelikult on. Sa märkad... sa märkad et ta pole nagu kõik teised täpid.
"Ja nüüd tagasi välisuudiste juurde: teadlased ei ole ikka veel päris kindlad, miks elu on ilus."
Jimi Tenor
w like weekend
this time weekend started at thursday with my friends bday, got home at 3, had a train in the morning round 6, so i slept with my burton snowboard hat on, the mobile with the alarm on under the hat, so i could def hear it... got to Tallinn, lingered in the city until friends picked me up and we went to the horror film festival in Haapsalu, which all in the end was a total blast. and sat too and actually it has been such a great weekend that i really dont feel like sharing this with you, eheh.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
mando diao
todays songs, all from the same artist:
a) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ay65D2kAH5Y&NR=1
b) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9rLqHBaxBg
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8Zqi_SGhmk
d) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KTlAEOTl14&feature=related
e) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0NlCexv2MoE&feature=related
f) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9cTiiInZIV0&feature=related
a) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ay65D2kAH5Y&NR=1
b) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9rLqHBaxBg
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8Zqi_SGhmk
d) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KTlAEOTl14&feature=related
e) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0NlCexv2MoE&feature=related
f) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9cTiiInZIV0&feature=related
HÕFF aka fckyeaniceweekend
I called I today:
M:"I can you drive?"
I:"I cant tell, yesnomaybe. Why?
M:"Well you sure drive me crazy..."
ah, the weekend is going to be greatt
and I will roll a fat one for H and I, yesyes.
and the weekend will be even better
BUJAAAA, let the sun in and worries out!
M:"I can you drive?"
I:"I cant tell, yesnomaybe. Why?
M:"Well you sure drive me crazy..."
ah, the weekend is going to be greatt
and I will roll a fat one for H and I, yesyes.
and the weekend will be even better
BUJAAAA, let the sun in and worries out!
uplatelyinmyhead
i dont know whats the story with weird names for the blogs i think i cant express myself anymore with one word. or its just one word that expresses me. i need sleep and i am tired of thinking too much and not studying at all. today or was it yesterday - i let the sun in me and she is right, the world starts to turn again! the winter is officially over, its been like long time of frozen beauty and shit, sickness and dark hours, cold and nice evenings at once and now it all has melted and damn right i will go with the flow and let myself carry with it. the tide is high. i want to let it all in and let go of all the rest and fucking enjoy the wakening outside. and wake inside. its coming and i feel it, little by little, i feel happier and tickelish and i want to do good and smile more. today L was totally down and sick after the doc not even able to get out from her place so i took my last pennies and free moments and run to the dorm to bring some fresh juice and colorful salad. she was happy. people happy around you should be not envied but you should let them shine on you, i feel this the more i talk with H or A, friends are humans and humans can be tired of being in the middle of everyones life, especially when you are actually tired of it yourself. sometimes some things must be solved yourself, youve just got to figure it out yourself. like O had bday and i gave him a picture I drew of Puhh flying with a balloon staring at the angry "honeybirds" and the meaning was simply "face your fears and find your honey". we had not seen eachother for a weird weektime now and i realized i missed this person and i simply enjoy the company bad so the latenite cider was a good idea after all .)i am sucking in the sun and getting ready for the weekend semi Haapsalu/Tallinn. today i just found myself thinking of asking one day tallinn to come over to tartu too, at the moment when we can go to sit outside at grass and take a beer and get our asses naked in zavood after a supercool concert, if they would like to come. Id cook, massage, smoke and bath em. if not I´ll just drag H here and we go out with the misses A and I. and she is also right about one other thing, whenever you find yourself in times of trouble, and mother mary comes to speak the words of wisdom, then fuck mary - the answer is work. depressed or crazy, let it all out - write crazy poems, paint sick paintings, go and take photos of old people, write songs or read as much as you can and do the schoolstuff, just simply work. the more you do (fuck the tiredness) the more you are.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
etv
he left, for ever. went straight to the estonian tv to shoot with my brother and had a busy morning there shooting and helping with the set design, had a great experience - holding the camera on the shoulder, man - heavy stuff! and I really liked the vibe in ETV, all these people saying hi in the house and sitting to your table in the cafe asking random things about random stuff. walked home trough the city and bought a great deal of flowers to my mum from one of these old ladies. the sun is shining and I am saying "enough".
weimeanineedichange
theseriousdepressiveloneliness
andcolourlesseveningsindamplight
fuckitallthesunisheresheishere
enough
allyouneedtoknowissheisthere
forgetitallnoneedtofeeltoomuch
leavethebitterbehindandopenyourself
enough
istnotagamemyfrienditisyourlife
youarejustyouaperseonsomebodyright?
levaeitallbehindandopenyoureyes
enough
andcolourlesseveningsindamplight
fuckitallthesunisheresheishere
enough
allyouneedtoknowissheisthere
forgetitallnoneedtofeeltoomuch
leavethebitterbehindandopenyourself
enough
istnotagamemyfrienditisyourlife
youarejustyouaperseonsomebodyright?
levaeitallbehindandopenyoureyes
enough
Saturday, April 11, 2009
imogen heap tells stuff about mia
where are we?
what the hell is going on?
the dust has only just begun to fall
crop circles in the carpet
sinking feeling
spin me round again
and rub my eyes,
this can't be happening
when busy streets a mess with people
would stop to hold their heads heavy
hide and seek
trains and sewing machines
all those years
they were here first
oily marks appear on walls
where pleasure moments hung before the takeover,
the sweeping insensitivity of this still life
hide and seek
trains and sewing machines (oh, you won't catch me around here)
blood and tears (hers)
they were here first
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmm that you only meant well?
well of course you did
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmmm that it's all for the best?
of course it is
Mmmm whatcha say?
Mmmm that it's just what we need
you decided this
whatcha say?
Mmmm what did she say?
ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut outs
speak no feeling no I don't believe you
you don't care a bit,
you don't care a bit
(hide and seek)
ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut outs
(hide and seek)
speak no feeling no i don't believe you
you don't care a bit,
you don't care a (you don't care a) bit
(hide and seek)
oh no, you don't care a bit
oh no, you don't care a bit
what the hell is going on?
the dust has only just begun to fall
crop circles in the carpet
sinking feeling
spin me round again
and rub my eyes,
this can't be happening
when busy streets a mess with people
would stop to hold their heads heavy
hide and seek
trains and sewing machines
all those years
they were here first
oily marks appear on walls
where pleasure moments hung before the takeover,
the sweeping insensitivity of this still life
hide and seek
trains and sewing machines (oh, you won't catch me around here)
blood and tears (hers)
they were here first
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmm that you only meant well?
well of course you did
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmmm that it's all for the best?
of course it is
Mmmm whatcha say?
Mmmm that it's just what we need
you decided this
whatcha say?
Mmmm what did she say?
ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut outs
speak no feeling no I don't believe you
you don't care a bit,
you don't care a bit
(hide and seek)
ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut outs
(hide and seek)
speak no feeling no i don't believe you
you don't care a bit,
you don't care a (you don't care a) bit
(hide and seek)
oh no, you don't care a bit
oh no, you don't care a bit
Friday, April 10, 2009
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
The way of human being - a faceless portrait
I am writing a storyboard for a friend of mine and getting a total boner out of it, the short photomovie is about portraiting and it is called "The way of human being - a faceless portrait". Quess who is the star of these few minutes - Francois ofcourse! To those who doesent know, Francois is the hooker standing besides my table). Okok, I just want to be cool - its a mannequin I stole from a movie set... And we will go shooting next weekend to Hiiumaa with my brother the first shots of the documental about Ave Alavainu, cant wait. I`ll upload some pictures when the time is right. Todays playlist:
a)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDRLpI6R6zk
I love this one:
b)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5u7gj0A14Qs
c)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgRsYkKb1eI
d)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZRG1mBhg-4&feature=channel
and then I found today this crazy guys called Grizzly Bear, who have totally weird and creepy and cool music videos, for example:
*http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qnrn-dieats&feature=related
*http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuYZbYtAl9A&feature=related
a)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDRLpI6R6zk
I love this one:
b)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5u7gj0A14Qs
c)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgRsYkKb1eI
d)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZRG1mBhg-4&feature=channel
and then I found today this crazy guys called Grizzly Bear, who have totally weird and creepy and cool music videos, for example:
*http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qnrn-dieats&feature=related
*http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuYZbYtAl9A&feature=related
Monday, March 30, 2009
cassavetes
I am totally discovering Cassavetes. By 1956, Cassavetes had begun teaching method acting in workshops in New York City. An improvisation exercise in one workshop inspired the idea for his writing and directorial debut, Shadows (1959; first version 1957). Shadows is claimed to be impro movie. The role of improvisation in Cassavetes' films is frequently misunderstood. His films were — with the exception of the original version of Shadows — heavily scripted. Confusion arises in part because Cassavetes allowed actors to bring their own interpretations of characters to their performances. Performances were scripted, but delivery was not. Otherwise he would be just way to cool. Saw "Shadows" no time ago and I still feel the vibe of it, left a very nice impression and I think its partly because the actors have had a point while writing the thing to modify the text, but ofcourse due to some very good camera, music and lightning work. Like in one part of the movie, one of the main caracters is on the bed and helds a trumpet which he never plays but you can hear it on the background playing as soundtrack while he is pressing the buttons of the instrument and blowing. Or there is a scene after two caracters having sex and she lost her virginity - she raises up, upset about something and when the guy comes behind her, the light is straight into his face what is kind of weird and at the same time totally mindblowing. Not to even talk about the fact that you can feel hat he had teached acting before, as one of the main caracters - the guy Benny,was a genial actor. Well, youve got to see it yourself.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
check this shiet
todays playlist goes:
favourite of the day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hk5DLSklSlw
a) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmLJVKzlinY&feature=related
b) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lqOZc3bu6Y&feature=related
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7dbcmGm_vI&feature=related
d)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4lnk_0SifE
e)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_7yEpu3Z2M
f) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eRNQ7AJghFc
favourite of the day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hk5DLSklSlw
a) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmLJVKzlinY&feature=related
b) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lqOZc3bu6Y&feature=related
c) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7dbcmGm_vI&feature=related
d)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4lnk_0SifE
e)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_7yEpu3Z2M
f) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eRNQ7AJghFc
Monday, March 23, 2009
n like night
its about the weird feelings what you sometimes get when an idea strikes your head and you wake up in the middle of the night and write it down on a napkin you blew your nose the day before and feel sorry that you fucking cant read it out in the morning... the library is a magical place, sometimes I think that it could be another world, just for its weird people and books that it consists of. like today, i walked in to the classical literature section and for no good reason went straight to the book I needed, never knowing that it was there. today i think i wrote the best song thay i have ever written, but its just because of the material - the mindblowing helen song .D her bday is coming. waitwaitwaitng. meeting adairmaandculpa was the most positive thing that could happen in this drunken city of spirit of whatsoever.uve was over, chocogoodtimes. so much of the real life, here I keep existing in my own little world of smells and feelings that have taste and songs and poems and stories and dreams and movies and thoughts and paintings and photos and all this that will never come true, but then again, if I already thought on them, why couldnt they exist just because of that?
a smell day
the cranberries - wake up and smell the coffee would be the song. sometimes it makes me crazy that i tend to smell people. inthe mall there was a lady who smelled like cabbages, i think she cooked them two days ago and some got stuck in her pocket... and then in the train once there was this older, handsome man, who smelled like fresh coffe and something like sleepy mornings and ofcourse tasty kisses. the girl who passed me today in the library smelled like fresh flowers altough it is gray outside and two days ago a beautiful women afront of me in the shop smelled like she just came out of the shower, a guy close to me in the party at thursday smelled like too much alcohol and being dumped, a week ago someone close to me smelled like smiles and a friend smelled like love just like air smells pure after the rain today in the morning the weather smelled tired.
Friday, March 6, 2009
does feelings have taste?
I think yes. I mean - why not? so many things are remem bered by smells or the parfume. we remember how people smell and sometimes we hate or love it, many times it depends just because we hate or love the person... smell is like a piece of memory cake. smells have something to to with feelings and feelings have something to do with taste. some kisses are sweet and some are bitter. like some smiles, some looks, some moves or words. maybe we remember better, as with taste we have a more complete memory of a moment. I remember in "My blueberry nights" there was a kissing scene, when while the couple was kissing, a close-up of tasty blueberry pie and cream running over it, just genial! sometimes kisses taste like that or why there is a reason then that they call bad mood bitter? we just never have the time to think about it or recall the moments or even to preserve them at the time, they have their own life and we forget how the feeling tasted like. I am so sorry for forgetting them.
The song of the day would be by Elbow "One day like this".
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